Someone recently asked me if I was on Twitter. I’m not, nor am I on Instagram or Pintrest or LinkedIn or Tumblr or any other of these bizarre ‘social media’ sites. I’m just not interested in #tweeting away or constantly uploading photos of the sunsets.
This got me thinking: why? Or rather, why not?
5 reasons to be on Twitter:
Instant sharing of photos, videos and statuses.
Obvs. Useful to ensure your FOMO levels remain high and you can get beta for conditions.
You can now tweet from El Cap and the Grandes Jorasses.
The internet is everywhere. Embrace it and text your mates pictures from the shiver-bivvies in the Alps.
All the stars have it.
Steve, Ben, Nick... even Twid is on it. Everyone’s on it. Might as well join the cool kids and get uploading.
Silly name
Shouldn’t be important but... I could totally get a stupid name: The Livingbone, Living Stone, Dead Pebble, etc etc... There’s always the classics: Ben Dover, Al Coholic, Joe King.
‘Update the fans’
When your mates catch you messing about on your phone at the crag and they take this piss, saying you’re “updating the fans,” you could reply, “Yeah, I am!” LOL.
Thankfully: There are many reasons not to be on Twitter/Instagram etc.
It’s a pointless activity
Which means less time climbing and more time staring at my phone - google ‘buffering face.’
I rarely get enough internet
So it would be rubbish. An old phone, plus living at Plas y Brenin, North Wales... no internets.
I can glance at Twatter at my leisure
Rather than constantly being ‘pinged’ by notifications and updates.
No fans
Obviously I’m secretly terrified that I won’t have millions of followers, waiting with bated breath for every tweet. That would be such a shame... naaaat.
This list could go on… but instead I’m going to play outside!
Obviously I’ll try not to be a hypocrite but, for the time being, I can’t see myself getting Twitter any time soon. #shame #megalolz #seeyououtside #solongandthanksforallthefish!